Meeting Aesclepius and A Walk in Anothers Shoes

Meeting Aesclepius

I'm not quite sure that I got to meet him the first two times I attempted this exercise, as once I again I fell fast asleep, but I think by the third time I at least got a glimpse. I was able to relate to the feeling of the mind feeling like a waterfall and by the end of the exercise I can honestly say that my mind was more like a still pond. There are times when I am focusing on my breathing that I actually feel and even visualize my breath coming in and out of my body. When I first started during these exercise this focus actually made me a little nervous but now I have found a rhythm like when I am on a distance run. The person that comes to mind when doing this exercise is a very close friend of mind named Joanna. There is a radiance about her that even when you aren't around her you can feel her prescence, warmth, and love. While doing this exercise I focused on her strength and some of the latest words of wisdom she gave me. A great sense of peace, calmness, and warmth filled me and the things that have troubled me lately just seem to disappear and find their own answer. This meditation exercise was extremely relaxing and insightful; I have not slept that sound and peaceful in several months. I even awoke the next morning feeling fresh and ready to start the day even though I knew my obstacle was still there. In the end it helped me figure out an alternative to the issue while at the same time enabling a sense of self empowerment.

The meditation exercises over the last few weeks have been very insightful to my own spiritual health. I have learned to disconnect the connotation or religion and spirituality. I am not saying that I do not believe in a higher power I just don't find solace and peace in organized religion; in fact the whole thing stresses me out. I grew up in a black Southern Baptist family where my dad was the minister of our church. I always felt that people were sitting there passing judgement; judgement on what people were wearing, judgement on peoples choices, judgement on someone being ill, nothing but judgement. I don't feel that this is what 'God' has intended for anyone. I never felt comfortable enough to bare my soul in church for fear of this judgement. I love the space that I am in now; I accept me regardless of what anyone else thinks; I can bare all aspects of being before my God and to myself and there is no judgement. The more I meditate the more I feel connected to my core values, to God, to nature, and the world. I hope that as I continue this journey people will see this change in me and hopefully I can share it with them as well.

The Walk

"One cannot lead another where one has not gone himself". What more can really be said about this statement? It is about as cliche as you can get....I'm not trying to sound snooty or indifferent it's just that this concept is taught ad nausem but few actually follow it. We see it everyday from parents that tell there children not to smoke when they do, leaders that expect their subordinates to follow the rules when they don't, etc. When you think about it why would you want to follow someone who has no experience in what they are trying to teach or enforce. It kind of goes back to the saying of the blind leading the blind. It is far easy to have respect and take to heart the words of someone who has lived or experienced something when they are offering their wisdom. Although this concept can become frustrating to those who feel that there are far too many hypocrites in this world it does negate the fact that we should make a concerted effort to embrace it in our personal and professional lives. Often times I have patients that come in with an injury or illness and they will ask, "Have you been through this yourself" or "Have you treated anyone with this before". The look of relief and trust that comes over their faces when I am able to relate to them through my experiences is priceless. Not too long ago I had a teenager that came through my clinic and she had just lost her mother. At first she said, "Why should I bother talking to you, you wouldn't understand". Then I think she saw the look on my face because she recanted by saying, "Maybe you do". I was able to relate my experience of losing both of my parents when I was a teenager. As a health care professional I do feel a sense of obligation to maintain my psychological, physical, and spiritual health. For my own conscience I could not look my patients in the face or teach a class if I didn't feel I was at least attempting to maintain these levels of my life. I believe that you really have to practice what you preach. The process to implementing psychological and spiritual growth at first seems tedious but when you step back and actually look at all the learning possibilities it really isn't that hard. Each day I learn something from everyone around me, my co-workers, my patients, my partner, my step-daughter, etc. Taking as little as 5 minutes a day to just reflect and find quiet and peace will slowly start to take its course in your life. With school and work my quiet time is in the shower in the morning. No one is up, not even the dogs. I can stand there in a nice hot shower, focus on the water cleansing my body on the outside and inside and just be.